LIFE LESSONS

Paano mo malalaman kung handa ka nang magmahal?

Habang tumatanda, nag-iiba na ang pananaw ng tao tungkol sa pag-ibig. Hindi na lang ito basta crush lang or admiration.

When adults speak of love, they already speak of a lifetime partner. In my circle of friends, this is how they see love. Iba na talaga kapag #adulting.

Sa ika-59 na araw na Quarantine sa Pilipinas, hindi ko rin alam kung bakit may dalawang kaibigan ang nagtanong sa akin nito. Sa akin pa po talaga tinanong samantalang malapit na ata akong mawalan ng emosyon. Haha!

Pero paano mo ba masasabi kung handa ka na (ulit) magmahal?

Handa ka nang magmahal kung…

1. Handa ka nang masaktan.

I guess, we all know that love and pain is a package, na kapag nagmahal ka, asahan mo na may sakit talaga sa simula, sa gitna, lalong-lalo na sa dulo. Handa ka bang sumugal? Handa ka bang mag-risk sa panibagong tao? Handa ka bang masaktan ulit?

2. Handa ka nang magkwento ng sariling bagahe

Sa  pag-ibig, lahat may kanya-kanya tayong dalang bagahe. Ito ‘yung mga alaala at karanasan na nakuha mo sa dating ispesyal na tao sa buhay mo. Alam mong handa ka nang magmahal kapag ‘yung mga bagahe na nakuha mo noon ay kaya mong i-open sa bagong taong makakasama mo. Hindi ka na magdadalawang-isip mag-open up kung handa ka nang magmahal.

3. Handa ka nang magpatawad.

Napatawad mo na ba ang iyong sarili? Napatawad mo na ba ang mga taong nakagawa ng kasalanan sa iyo noon? Kung oo, bukod sa handa ka nang magmahal, handa ka na nga talagang mahalin pa ang iyong sarili. Magkakaroon ka rin ng kapayapaan dahil alam mong sa pagpapatawad natatapos ang lahat ng sakit.

4. Handa ka nang kumilala ng iba.

Ito ‘yung estado ng buhay na sobrang nakilala mo na ang sarili mo. Alam mo na kung sino ka, naabot mo na totally ang ilan sa mga pangarap mo, nasa estado ka ng buhay na handa ka nang maging bukas sa pagkilala naman ng ibang tao.

5. Handa ka na sa kung ano man ang susunod na mangyayari.

Maaaring nasaktan ka nang paulit-ulit ng iba’t ibang tao sa pare-parehong dahilan. Pero alam mo ba, malalaman mo kung handa ka nang magmahal ulit kapag ipinaubaya mo na sa Diyos ‘yung mga susunod pang mangyayari. Let God work. Allow Him to guide you.

Sa ilang taon kong paglalakad sa mundo, nasa punto na rin ako ng pagsuko sa ganito. Malapit na akong mag-trenta. Pinaprangka na ako ng magulang ko na mag-asawa na. Pero naniniwala pa rin ako sa oras ng Diyos. Darating ang panahon na makikilala (o baka nakilala ko na? ‘di lang kami aware?) ko na ‘yung ni-reserve na tao ni Lord para sa akin.

‘Wag sukuan ang pag-ibig, mga kapatid. 🙂

LIFE LESSONS

Your failure is an opportunity to grow.

This blog post is dedicated to those people who are questioning their existence especially in this time of COVID 19. Dear friends, I know it is not so easy to plan any grand gestures/goals because we are quarantined. Kaya sa blog na ito, ibabahagi ko sa inyo ang ilang quarantine thoughts na napag-usapan namin ng best friend ko.

The Story Behind This Post

Pang-ilang araw na nga ba ng quarantine? ‘Di ko na mabilang. Halos lahat ng araw kasi na lumilipas, pareho na lang. Nakakalungkot na ring isipin na ang dami nang COVID19 cases sa Pilipinas at sa buong mundo. Marami rin namang good news, sa kabilang banda. Kaya lang, pagkatapos mapansin lahat ng nasa labas na balita, hindi talaga natin maiiwasan na tumingin at bumalik sa panloob na sitwasyon ng sarili.

Bago matapos ang araw, naranasan mo na bang tanungin ang sarili mo kung productive ka? Nakagawa ka ba ng maraming bagay? Natuto ka ba ng bagong skill? May nabasa ka bang libro? May naluto ka ba? Nakapagsimula ka na ba sa dream project mo? Lagpas isang buwan na kasi. Anong natapos mo? Ang haggard isipin ng konsepto ng productivity ngayong may crisis. Lalo, mas mahirap isipin ang konsepto ng success sa mga ganitong panahon.

Paano ba natin ilu-look forward ang success sa ganitong panahon? Para bigyan kayo ng ideya, in-interview ko ‘yung classmate ko nung high school na si Paul De Vera. Sa ngayon, ‘di niyo pa siya kilala, so I suggest, check his Facebook page muna.

On Success

Sumali ‘tong friend ko sa dalawang singing contest sa TV. Singer siya at hilig niya talagang sumali sa contest. Kaya lang, hindi talaga sa lahat ng pagkakataon ay happy moments. For him it is okay not to win. Proud naman siyang sabihin na bagamat hindi siya nanalo, hindi siya nakaramdam ng sama ng loob. Alam niyo kung bakit? He is surrounded by a good group of people. He is with a good company.

Ibig sabihin, kailangan natin ng tama at mabuting kaibigan in order to succeed.

Be surrounded by the right and kind people.

Some people would appreciate you even at your darkest moments and even at your weakest point. You won’t feel bad if you are with those people.

Habang nagmamaneho siya ng sasakyan, tinanong ko ulit siya kung paano ba siya nag-cope sa failures at downfalls. Ang hirap kaya ng dalawang beses natalo on national TV. Tapos, heto sinabi ni bes.

Your failure is an opportunity to grow.

If we only try to embrace opportunities as we fall, then we will grow. To those who are reading this, tandaan niyo sana ‘tong sentence na ito. Alam kong alam niyo na ‘to, pero pinapaalala ko lang ulit.

On taking risks 

People nowadays are fond of taking risks. (Ako rin! Dati!)

My good friend told me na dapat daw piliin ang mga bagay na may risks. Kung may iti-take kang risk, make sure na meron ka pa ring plano once na bumagsak. Plan B, ikanga. Kapag hindi ka nagtagumpay, anong sunod na plano?

Sa pag-take ng risks, minsan, mismong pamilya natin ‘yung hindi sasang-ayon. Alam mo ‘yon? Alam natin na gusto lang ng mga mahal natin sa buhay na nasa comfortable state tayo. Kaya lang, is there growth in your comfort zone? 

My friend is a freelance host, and singer. I strongly admire people who work freelance. Hindi kayang madaling i-maintain ang ganoong estado ng buhay. Sabi niya lang naman na ang tanging pinagsisihan niya about freelancing is not trying it earlier.

Sana pala ay noon niya pa nasimulan. Kung maaga daw siya nag-take ng risk to freelance, mas marami siyang failures at mas marami siyang matututunan. Lahat ng ito ay later on magagamit niya talaga as an opportunity to grow.

I agree that my failure is an opportunity to grow if I would take it as a challenge. Dapat ko rin i-handle nang maayos ang lungkot at the same time. Marami akong trust issues since birth. Ako ata ang trust issues na naging tao. Kaya sobrang kailangan kong pag-aralan mag-cope sa failures, sa lungkot, at sa frustrations.

How are you coping, friends? I hope you are all doing fine. 

 

LIFE LESSONS

Introvert Mode: Bed Over Beach

Bed Over Beach and Big Events

I’m at the point in my life when I get too tired easily. Too much work in school. Too much worries at home. Too much schedule and sideline to deal with. I could be your most optimistic friend but sometimes, bad things happen, and I find it okay.

Maybe, this comes as I age. In my younger years, I used to write 30-50 articles in a week. I can hustle until 9pm. Now, as I embrace the side effects of the Philippines transport crisis, I get tired going home. The traffic just worsens every single day.

Despite this sorrowful introduction for my blog, I never lose hope. I’ve learned to find balance by finding time to rest. Yes. Rest. Basic, right?

Rest is a four-letter word that sometimes people tend to forget. I confess, I also forget to rest. I’m that kind of person with an annual planner that is full of schedule. I am amazed when my planner is filled with so many activities, whether it is personal, work-related, or church-related. My eyes always sparkle whenever my weekend is filled with productive days.

But still, my age told me to find time to rest. My system encouraged me to enjoy solitude at certain times. As of this typing, I am trying to grant that desire to be alone.

For the second Saturday of October, I politely declined an invitation to join an outing. My understanding friends respected that decision. Thank God. I also did not join a conference (which I initially planned). I just stayed home with lola… until 4:00PM.

After 16 hours of staying at home, my lola asked me to do some errands. Then, boom. That errand made me bring my laptop, notebooks, and will to write this blog. I am taking the opportunity to write something.

I really find it challenging to write when I am at home because we made our house so comfy and desirable place where we can rest. It seems like working is not meant to be done there. Or baka mas gusto ko lang talaga magpahinga sa bahay.

So basically, I am alone while typing this. I super enjoyed solitude that I get too lazy meeting friends on a random basis. For me, time is such a non-renewable resource and I should only give my time to those people who really need it. I literally chose bed over beach and big events. Hurray for that success.

It’s a small victory for me to stay at home or to type a blog post somewhere else. Hence, this deserves a space on my humble blog, right?

How’s your week so far? May you all have a satisfying weekend ahead.

LIFE LESSONS

Thankful for the gift of writing!

It’s really hard to write rom-com when you know you are not in the mood to write those kind of stuff, ‘di ba? If you’ve been following my blog, you’ll know that I am(was, idk) a romance writer who adds humour to her stories. Actually, it’s started in college, just pursued for some years after graduation. Most of my writings are somehow funny.

Right now, I am more on writing my #adulting reflections about life. I am focused on writing short poems, and short essays on my page. I created this page in 2014, and I only got active in posting some stories after five years. But, it was never too late, I believe.

I am writing this post to remember how I am blessed to receive a feedback from my friend regarding my reflection last Sunday. Here’s her message: “Thank you sa mga post mong mahaba kahit na kadalasan di ko masyadong binabasa (pwera today). Just keep on posting your reflections. Di mo alam, baka you’re saving someone’s life.”

Of course, I was a bit shookt. I am writing my reflections on my page as an extension of my kadaldalan in real life. Never did I know that I could be of help to someone.

She added: “Pureness of heart is a gift from God. And it can be taken away, anytime, from you by the ‘enemy’ if you let your guard down. May our good Lord preserve your gift!”

I couldn’t be more thankful. I meditated upon these words, and I totally agreed with every single word. I am humbled.

Yes, there are lots or reason why we should be sad, worried, anxious, and revengeful at the same time. However, God has equipped us with the power to endure and resist these factors.

We always have the power to have a pure heart.

May God also bless your heart.

LIFE LESSONS

Kumusta ka na Trap

Kumusta ka na? Chronicles

When you’re hurt, chances are, your friends will instantly pop unto your screen and ask you, “Kamusta ka na?”

You might feel privileged, knowing that, at least, some people will cheer you when you are totally messed up.

However, before you answer that question, ask yourself first if the person who asks that is a REAL friend. Why? Because not all people who ask you that question really cares. (Aww. It’s a disappointing reality that we must deal with.)

Not all people care. Some ask for the sake of asking that question. Some ask because they have nothing to do. Some ask because they want to see you suffer. This could be the most pessimist post I have written so forgive me. (Life for me, lately, isn’t sweet. Haha.)

I just want to remind everyone that not all people really care, and THAT’S OKAY. You do not need the complete validation coming from mere acquaintances.

Sometimes, answering “Okay lang,” to that question is enough. This phrase contains magic that will eventually dissolve follow-up questions.

 

Stick to your Real Friends. 🙂

Here’s what you can do: STICK TO THE REAL ONES. Real friends are not those who sacrifice everything for you. No one can do that (only Christ, or your family).

Real friends are those people who will make you feel everything’s gonna be fine. They can sing chants that magically calm you. They can make you feel hopeful and cheerful no matter what the situation is.

Real friends may be far from you, but distance does not matter for them. Time > Distance is their mantra. They will find or make time for you.

Real friends do not tolerate your wrongdoings. They are frank with their opinion. They remind what’s best for you. They certainly tell you what they think is more beneficial and morally right.

Lastly, REAL FRIENDS pray for you and lead you closer to God. These people bless you with the assurance coming from God. They may not be perfect but they do accept the fact that God has already saved and healed them. They will never ever judge you instead they do understand your situation and your feelings.

 

Finale

This post is just a mere realization about my life lately. I don’t know why I only have to realize it just now. Maybe, I was so amiable and gregarious to open myself up to the people whom I think I can trust. Huhuhu. Loyal and faithful people are so rare these days. If you have found yours, keep it. It’s totally a rare find.